How To Build A Great Social Circle

Back to the Academy

In the podcast above, Ciaran talks with Las Vegas nightclub promoter and dating coach Drew Schroeder about building a social circle.

Yo yo this is Ciaran and here are the biggest takeaways from my interview with Drew Schroeder on building a social circle.

Do cold approach but in the right places

Know where your audience is and be where they are. 

Who are your audience? What is your ideal type of girl? In clubs, the best looking women tend to be in the VIP hanging out with the owners so if that’s your target then you know where to be. But whatever sorts of people do you want in your circle? Sporty? Entrepreneurial? Creative? These people all hang out in different places so you need to think about who you audience is, work out where they are, and then be at those places.

Be seen often

Constantly being seen in a yoga studio will make the people there comfortable with you and trust you to a degree they wouldn’t if you weren’t often there. I’m business they say you need to see something about 15 times in order to get comfortable enough to seriously contemplate buying it and this rule is also true for social situations.

Don’t ignore the benefit of being seen again and again and again – it’s called the propinquity effect and is very real

Connect your circle with like minded souls

A great way to provide value for the people in your circle is to connect them with each other. Let’s say you know an entrepreneur with a great business idea and an angel investor who is always looking for businesses to put money into; connecting them will make both think very highly of you. This can and will pay off at some point in the future.

Follow the rule of reciprocity

Essentially you want to give value so that people want to pay you back. The people in your circle will greatly appreciate having someone who’s happy to help them achieve their goals. The more you give without expectation to the people in your network, the more they’ll want to give to you in future.

Don’t get too hung up on your fuck-ups

If you mess up, people can and will forget. Keep conversations going if you say something embarrassing. Don’t dwell on your mistakes, just keep moving forward and the mood will soon change. 

Maintain a good reputation 

Your reputation is your life. You need to be perceived a certain way and if your image is damaged it will affect your ability to achieve your goals. Remember that.

Ignore the haters 

They’re jealous and unhappy with their own lives. Nuff said.

Use social media effectively 

Post interesting/entertaining stuff onto your story and don’t hide yourself away. Show yourself living a fascinating life, and if your life currently isn’t fascinating then make it that way. Be in front of the camera and let people see who you are and what you’re about.

Don’t be scared to post pics with girls 

The social proof that will be gained by you doing so is through the roof. Other women will realise that you’re known and trusted by women and will hence trust and be attracted to you themselves. Even if they complain it’s basically just a shit test. Men will think you’re cool and want to associate with you. 

Make sure they follow you back

If the people you meet aren’t following you back on social media, they won’t see your updates or DMs.

Be aware of how much easier a social circle makes meeting women – they vouch for you 

Most people Meet their partners through social circle. The reason for this is that people place a great amount of value and the force and opinions of their friends. This means that, the women who meet you there mutual friends well Mike and respect you more because you have come trusted from unknown source. Half of the job of attracting the woman is letting her know that you are safe and parts rapist or a tree. When do you meet people through your social circle that problem is already taken care of in a way that it isn’t when you do daygame.

Don’t just approach for the sake of it – close the deal 

This isn’t directly related to social circle but it’s still a good point. Rather than try to get in a certain amount of approaches in an evening, attempt to go all the way and close the deal. Your ultimate goal isn’t to do a certain amount of approaches it’s to take women home or form relationships with them so try to do that as much as you can.